First We Eat

"First we eat, then we do everything else." I found this little quotation from the famous epicurean M.F.K. Fisher inlaid in the floor at a local PCC Market. It really is true when you stop and think about it. Nourishing our bodies is essential to our existence.

I once worked in the nutrition and dietetics department of a university medical center where I observed clinical dietitians working with children born with metabolic disorders like PKU or Galactosemia. Using a sophisticated metabolic cart they would produce caloric and energy analysis to help determine specific formulas and diets for the children so that they could thrive despite genetic barriers to normal processing of nutrients. I remember one sweet family in particular who came every couple of weeks to pick up cases of very specialized formula that we could obtain more cheaply in bulk for their child and others than they could through a pharmacy. Beyond the expense and inconvenience, I couldn't imagine how much stress they must have had around just getting that tiny daughter of theirs the kind of nutrition that would work with her body and allow her to live a normal life.

Even without medical concerns, most of us parents go through some stressful seasons wondering about our ability to feed our kids well and help inspire healthy eating habits. We tend to have some strong cultural values around food and eating that our families of origin have instilled in us--some that are healthy, some not so much. I remember at one Thanksgiving family gathering observing a distant cousin being shown by her mother-in-law to add cereals, formula, and blended fruits into her two month old's bottles of breast milk so that "he will be strong." When we saw them the following Thanksgiving, the 14 month old seemed quite obese and had just started cruising. In subsequent years I was glad to note that this kid, although solidly built was quite physically active with his parents and in community sports and in the norm for weight. That is not to say "super-feeding" an infant is a wise or good practice or that obesity is not a problem for many American kids. Common packaged foods in the USA have skyrocketed in calorie content in the last 20 years with alarming affects on child health and nutrition. Is my child eating enough? Too little? Are they getting balanced nutrition? Our food worries can be many. What have been your own concerns around your children's eating?

Most of the questions I get from parents are about "picky eaters." There also seems to be a whole subset of children who survive solely on cheese and bread, and others who are so busy, busy, busy they resist sitting at the table for family meals. Parents wonder what effects these concerning behaviors will have long-term. Some parents are very watchful of what a child is permitted to eat. They have become aware of changes in their child's health or behavior when certain types of food are consumed. Some encounter constant food battles with their child, and others get barbed comments from grandparents about the way they are feeding their kids. Family members become opinionated and emotional when talking about feeding children.

At Kidspace we are so fortunate to have a wonderful food program and be able to serve up a delicious and nutritious variety of foods in a calm relaxed, family style atmosphere. The children love Shoko and are always interested in what she is making. Children are provided USDA recommended portions of everything, and teachers leave the rest up to them. Children themselves determine what they eat and how much. Ellen Satter, an MS RD whose knowledgeable advice has given peace of mind to countless parents calls this "the division of responsibility." Adults organize the what, when, and where of feeding; children determine the how much and whether of eating from what adults provide. This division of responsibility helps put an end to the food struggles cycle of control and avoidance that parents and children sometimes fall into. Clinical studies have shown that over a period of a week or so a child will choose to eat a variety of foods. In an atmosphere of pleasant conversations with their friends and appetizing food before them, kids tend to enjoy meals and trying all kinds of nutritious things their friends and teachers are eating. Hopefully these pleasant experiences enhance their family mealtime experiences and give parents reason to cheer.